Shadow Void

To The Parents Of That Kid

Hi,

You don't know me and I don't know you, but I have to say is still important and you need to listen. You may or may not have a closeted son or daughter in your home. First off, don't panic! I promise you it's not the end of the world. It's going to be a shock at first and I understand that, but don't push them away, give them awkward silence, or try to change them. You didn't do anything to cause it. It's a mental illness or a disease. Yes, there will be challenges in their life. Yes, your child may face bullying. Remember using anti-gay speech around your son or daughter can send the message that you won't love them when you find out or that you don't love them period. Don't be one of those parents who toss away the relationship you have with your child just because they come out to you. Educate yourself and your family, because then you'll be empowered. Be ready to fight for your child, be ready to stand by your child, they may need you. Do be involved in their lives. There will be people who will walk away from your teen because they refuse to stand by them. I encourage you to learn the signs of depression and suicide. Be diligent! Do seek out professional help if your child needs it. Keep an open mind when your child comes to you. There are groups ready to take your hand. PFLAG is one of those groups. Something you may not realize is that GLBT youth often feel alone and isolated amongst their peers, their family, church, and community. You have the power to stand by them, to love them or the power to add to the voices that are hammering them. Coming out to you will be one of the scariest moments in their lives. It is something that they will always remember.

Sincerely,

Chuck

Help For Our Gay Youth

Many gay youth out there right now are struggling. There facing problems that as adults we have faced or that we are facing. Depending on the society in which they live can dictate the issues that they will face in life. Religion places unfair doubts and can cause unneeded damage. There are bullies. These issues are just the tip of the iceberg, but the question remains how can we make it easier for them to be young and gay.

Let's first address schools, all kids deserve to be safe at school. Our kids should know that when they bring a bullying situation to their principals, guidance counselors, or teachers that the issue will be dealt with and not just ignored. Teachers in public school need to be mindful of their students and not make comments that could harm kids. Counselors also need to be sensitive to the LGBT students in their schools. Larger schools may even have a GSA club which allows students to gather in a safe place. I believe that for our kids to be safe at school everyone at the school needs to be onboard. Counselors and perhaps even school nurses should be aware of community resources that help our youth. Overall, we need to be aware of our student's needs.

This next subject is perhaps the trickiest to pin down but I think it's fair to say that it puts a lot of burden on our kids and yes, even on adults. Pastors, priests, ministers, and bishops and all other clergy need to wake up. I do not believe that they know the power that they wield. When someone comes out to them, there is no reason for the person to be the subject of gossip, ridicule, or in any way made to feel inadequate. There is room for the GLBT community in our places of worship. Instead, religion seems to be weapon, which can be turned against our community. We need to do better and in some places we are doing better. I don't expect any religion or church to change their doctrine. Instead, I ask you not to preach hate. You can teach your doctrine without throwing people into the lake of fire. Not all of us need religion but some of us do need religion.

Communities, another hotspot where a hand can be reached out to our youth. Elected officials need to realize that when they use slurs or take an anti-gay stance that they're showing our youth that their leaders hate them or don't care about them. Maybe it isn't as big as an issue as the last two but it is still a major issue. Our leaders are the one's who make laws and then enforce them. I'm all for gay marriage but I also see where civil unions are important also. I will fight for everyone in my community. We need resources that are visible to our youth. Money needs to be put where it can do our youth the most good. Bottom line here, we should be equal and we're not.

Our kids need not feel alone and isolated amongst a sea of people. We need safe places both in the real world and online, where our youth won't feel alone and isolated. We have the power to create a less lonely world for our world. It may not be possible to fix every problem in youths lives, but we can work towards brighter future. We have awesome organizations who are giving back to our community in ways that cannot be counted. Though things can look bright and promising, remember life doesn't always serve up roses.

Reparative Therapy Ban And A Rant

I have never agreed with the notion of changing one's sexuality. It makes very little sense to me. It is a part of who we are as a person. Our sexuality does not define who are and it should not. I am hoping that California passes this law. I do not think this therapy really works. It may mask sexuality making one believe that they have been "cured". Religion plays a major role in parents wanting their kids to be changed. Gay kids have enough to deal with in this life without adding this insanity on top of it. To me it tells a kid, that their parents do not think their kid is normal so they put their hopes in this therapy. I would love to know the "success" rate of reparative therapy. I know there are people who claim to have been fixed or cured of their sexuality, but I am not convinced. I hope the citizens of California do the right thing for their kids and see that this ban is passed.

Don’t Know You

Dear Shane,

I am just now hearing about your boyfriend's death. My first thought was that Tom's death was a suicide. Thanks to a little bit more digging I found out that his death was an accident. I assure this letter will be short. I won't take up much of your time. I am truly sorry to hear about Tom's family. It's sad that parents can't accept their kids. What they did to you and to your boyfriend is nothing short but sad. I'm sorry!

Just another gay guy

Chuck B.

Race

Race is an interesting factor, issue in our country. It supposedly affects crime rates, health issues, and other issues as well. It shouldn't have to be an issue in this day and age, but it is. People have a tendency to apply race issues when it comes to crime, civil rights, and even employment. Let's first look at crime! If one was to look at the stats, you might say that the worst crime areas are in cities or areas where race supposedly plays a part. I suspect though that if you dig further into those numbers that you find the economy is poor and that has an interesting effect on people. Clearly race shouldn't be a factor when it comes to crime stats. Race has divided us way too much in this country and in the world period. We have put people into camps, slavery, and exploited them all in the name of race. It's an evil that shouldn't exist today but we allow it to continue to fester in us, amongst us. People who allow race to play a part in choosing employees may only be hurting themselves. The question of race should be kept to the census and other surveys. Anyway, sorry this isn't long winded but I wanted to put some thoughts up on it.

A Must See Video

 

BigFoot / Yeti Take Your Pic

Taking a minute or two to talk about something that is of slight interest to me, it's something called cryptozoology. I believe that the two different creatures Bigfoot and yeti are unique individual species. I would say that that they are Hominidae, perhaps Homo Australopithecus, but who knows. I do not want us to ever find either of these fellows. I think that there are some things that don't need to be discovered. Why can't we have secret places left in the world? Some Native Americans held bigfoot as a spirit, and as such should be left alone. It needs to be left alone. Please if you see this, leave the creatures alone. What do you think??

Nature Experience ( Insect Collecting)

I've always had an interest in insects but never did much with that interest. I never did any insect collecting until college. In college, I took entomology and had to take have an insect collection. I had everything that I needed to make a collection from my net to my little tags. Each tag has my name, the date caught, how it was caught, and where it was caught on it. Keep in mind that I had to collect as from as many different insect orders as possible, so the collection had to include hymenoptera. Hymenoptera by the way is the order that bees, wasps, and ants are found in. It's also the one group of insects that I have a slight distaste for because of being stung. It was always a lot of fun to transfer a mad bee or wasp from the net into the killing jar. My least favorite capture was the Bumblee. I swear it had was pure evil. I kind of got a little rush as I got that insect into the jar. I don't do insect collecting any more. Nowadays it's more about capturing them on my camera, which I haven't done that much of this year. If I get a chance next year, I need to get back to my roots on stuff.

Gay Porn Star Ceasar (sp?) was discovered while stripping at a club here in my home town by Chi Chi herself.

July 24th

This date means nothing to most people unless their LDS ( Mormon ) or from Utah. It's called Pioneer Day and it's the date that the first LDS ( Mormon ) pioneers entered the Salt Lake Valley. It's a day set aside to remember the history and the sacrifices that those early church members had to make in order to cross the country. My mom's side of the family had ancestors who made that trek west. One story talks about 2 kids who stole an ox; a white ox and then the boys painted wheel grease on the animal. They were trying to make it look like it was white with black spots on it. Apparently, it caused some confusion before the boys ended up being caught. Some of the stories from that trek are truly amazing.