Shadow Void

thats why…. ??

thats why u f****** get aids and die, because god hates f*******

Okay loyal readers, you know that I get pissed I tend to vent and that I spend way too much reading things that tend to get me pissed. I saved the above piece from something that I read online just so I could comment on it when I had some time to do it. You know what gets me pissed. You want to know what kills me about ignorant people. Ignorant people are some of the most hateful people on the face of the planet. Gay people, men and women, get aids pretty much for the same dam reasons that straight people get aids and die. They get it A. because they had unprotected sex, B. they shared a needle , C they got a blood transfusion, or D. some other way of getting the virus. Second thing that really pisses me off to know end are people who wave banners around saying that God hates this and that God hates that. Okay so, get over yourselves! Jesus was among the Jews, the Pharisees to be exact, when they brought a woman to him. She had cheated on her husband. Now the Jews might have killed her, exiled her, or humiliated her for the sin that she committed. What did Jesus do, he told her to go and sin no more. Now, I'm not saying that we are sinners. What I'm saying is that a hateful Jesus wouldn't have told that woman to go and sin no more. He would have turned her over to the Jews. Jesus didn't burn the Romans and the Jews for putting him to the cross. No…he went ahead and made the ultimate act of love for us, the human race. He did it for the murderer, the peace keeper, racist, Sister Theresa, and the gay person next door. He loves everyone. Now…are you listening to this, are you really listening to what I am about to say, God doesn't hate Faggots, he loves everyone. Yes, he even loves loud mouthed homophobes like you. What he doesn't like is our sins. So where you listening to what I said or not. GOD LOVES THE GAYS! He loves all of this in that whose lives are touched by that beautiful rainbow. Each and every one of us! I wonder what he would say to someone who approached him saying that he hated faggots. By the way, people die from aids because it's a horrible disease not because of God.

Your comments and Questions

1.Anonymous from Skribit asked:

What is your all time favorite Tarantula species?

Good question, Anonymous! Here is my answer, my all time favorite tarantula species is http://www.bighairyspiders.com/pix/avicularia4.jpg. Here is my current A. avicularia:

Not the best picture of her but you get the idea. This species has never let me down. They are slightly nervous animals, very quick, but rarely if ever do they show aggression. Very good docile tarantula, which is why this guy happens to love this particular species.

Thanks anonymous!

2.Rick said:

"I have a sneaking suspicion they already know, so it won't be a shock to them. Don't play the "what if" game, it'll drive you crazy."

They have to know something. After all I have left pictures on my bed by mistake. What else are people going to think? No, I've never left nudes on my bed or have I?

Thanks Rick for the comment!

3.Mark said:

"Nice! Thank you!"

On my post entitled Everyone Claiming It!

Mark, You are very weclome my friend!

4. Rick said:

"Spring is coming! Wait, it's here...it's today!"

Spring is here! Our fruit trees are already getting ready to blossom. It's so pretty.

5.Ana G. had this to say:

Well I personaly think that your soul isn't doomed to hell...your soul will be fine! God loves you no matter what and who you are...it doesn't matter if you are gay or want to marry another man...everything that exists and that is in this world is because god ment it to...weather you are gay or not you are still a human being his child...he created you and all of us...god as our father his love for us is greater than anything even himslef...he is our father...uncomditional fatherly love n when you are old and die he will wait for you on the other side with arms open as long as you have been a good child in this earth....marry your lover I wish you the best!!!

Anna, Thank you! I appreciate your kind words.

Telling Them...

You have no idea how badly, I want to tell my parents. I know from previous experiences that there is a huge weight lifted off my shoulder. For some reason, I'm fearful. I know that it will end the lie but, I worry about their response. I know, I know I can't control their responses so I shouldn't be worried. Expect for that Mom has already shared her feelings about her strong dislike for the community. What about dad?? Well, I worry about his health and the way, he sometimes acts. I also fear losing the shelter that I have right now. I don't have it bad at home but that doesn't change the fact, that I don't like here. Still for now, this place is home. My situation isn't the best and I realize that being out will help reduce some of the stress in my life. Maybe I should just tell them the truth but for me it boils down to "What if...". I'm not one to make a leap of faith. Suppose, that says something about me. I know that I need to tell my parents. When is it going to take place is the question. I don't have a set date for it. So yeah any way, I'm gone for now.

Everyone Claiming It

I love getting comments. I even make it a point to not delete them. Sure, I don't always agree with them. The person who left the comment believes what they said is right or has a strong opinion equally as much as I do. I have no probs with people posting their opinions or questions in the comments. Many times, I take comments from another post and turn into a new post, that is what I've done here.

 

So now, I'm going jump into the meat of this post. The topic is "Should everyone be allowed to say that they are "Born this way.?". My answer is a definite no. Does that confuse you? Guess, that is okay! Want to know what I think?

 

I believe that there are things that we are born with that, we can control and things that we can't control. I'm not an expert in genetics, but I do have some background in it. The question is what stuff are we born with that we can't control. Well, We can't control our weight, eye color, hair color, or sexual orientation. We can't control whether we will have birth defect, have forms of mental challenges, or have some kind of genetic disease/disorder. While we can't control those things, there are things that we are genetically predisposed to that we can control. Being abused in life can lead us to abuse others, but that isn't something we are initially born with. We aren't made to abuse. A parent though who is obese can predispose their children to being obese, however we have choice on the weight issue. Smoking parents can predispose their kids to taking on smoking themselves. Still, a child can choose if they smoke or not. Parents who do drugs may predispose their kids to later becoming druggies themselves. I think you get the message. I think even the child who has parents who are diabetes has a chance of staying it off by watching their diet as long as they don't childhood diabetes. So what does that say for sexual orientation?

 

Well I don't believe that we suddenly become sexually attracted to a certain sex over night. I do believe that we can change our sexual orientation either, even though some guys or gals claim that it can be changed. It can't be fully charged. Sexual orientation ( gay , lesbian , bisexuality, and transgender ) does not change in life. I believe that we are born that way. Don't know how but I know that we are. I don't believe that pedophiles can claim that they are born this way. It's not a sexual orientation. It's a disease. I don't believe that bestiality is something that we are born with. So who else could possibly use the excuse that they are born this way? Hmm...drug users and drunks? Ummm...nope, because people turn themselves into drug users and drunks! Criminals? Guess, what nope, because once again people turn themselves into criminals. So what is left???? You tell me?

 

At Work; Gay Men Around boys

In case, you're new to my blog and haven't figured things out, I'm gay and I work in a public school. Oh...and I'm not alone in this area of work. However, this entry isn't about all the other guys and ladies who share my orientation and my profession or are teachers. I am an aide, a paraprofessional. I spend a lot of time around the kids that I work with. As in other areas of my life, I keep my sexual orientation under wraps. Right now, there are only two people who know my secret, the teacher that I work with and one of the aides.

 

It's funny but I don't care who knows about me or thinks they know something about me at one point almost all my co-workers in the classroom knew about me. It all came crashing down when the school system hired a new technology director who happened to be LDS ( Mormon ). Maybe I wouldn't' care except he attends at the same congregation as I do. I'm not ready to totally break off my church just yet. I don't know about anyone else, but I feel like it's my business and only my business who I am attracted too. Some of you will argue with me and say that I need to be out, I will in time.

 

I just don't feel that it's right for me to be openly gay in at work. It would benefit the kids at school who might be glbt. I mean, I knew by the time I was 13. I hated it. I wanted to be normal. So yeah it would be cool to give those kids someone they could talk too. It's because of my job duties that I keep things quiet. I want to be left alone to do my job. I don't need any more hassles. I am devoted to my job and the kids. Someone on gather made this comment in their response to one of my posts " Do you sometimes fear that, if people knew your secrets, that they will assume that you have a sexual interest in children?"

In today's climate it's easy to for me to consider that, there might be those who wouldn't want a guy whose into guys workings around their kids. The teacher knows and she isn't worried. I am expected to carry out all my duties. I do so with my heart. I love my students, even when I might be frustrated by their choices. It makes me sick to hear about people who abuse their position and power. It scares me when I see comments like this "putting homosexual men with little boys is like throwing the sheep to the wolves ". I am proud my job and my God given talents. I have a trust between my teacher, my fellow paraprofessionals, and especially my students. I will not break that trust. I've worked too hard to allow garbage to interfere with my good name and my reputation. To those who might argue that I shouldn't be around kids because I'm gay. I say BULLSHIT. Each day, that I'm in my classroom, I do good by my kids. Now about that last comment, let me address that a little bit more!

 

Putting homosexual men with little boys, is no worse than putting little boys around straight men. I hate to say this, but it's wrong. You are welcome to your opinion but that is all it is. If you want to leave comments like this or worse, they will be removed. There are other guys out there who are gay. They teach or are aides because they can. They teach because they love it, and I do what I would because of the same reason at least for now. We aren't wolves looking to prey on your kids. OH...and if there are wolves in the flock, they should be arrested purely for their thoughts. Guys who abuse their position give us a bad name. Far too many people have their panties and briefs all up in knot! Get over it!!

 

ANSWERS TO YOUR COMMENTS

Greg: The tune's not very subtle, is it? He's definitely fun to look at, though, and I do like the sign language. Those glasses are whack, but at least I can't see her reflected in his eyes when he's wearin' 'em. ; )

No, the tune isn't subtle at all. :)  I've been watching a lot of his stuff for awhiel now, and it's easy to see his body develop before my eyes.  What I admire most is the speed and coordination this guy has.  I would have to work day and night to get as good as Michael is and still have to work at it.  I want to say he's bisexual.  Though I could be wrong!

Rick:

Thanks for sharing.  Maybe someday, when you get your batteries, we'll get to see them.  Didn't you get your room renovated last year by the way?

 

Somewhere I have pictures of the room so you can at least see the color of the walls.  I don't know if I ever posted them to the site or not.  In case I didn't, I'll post them here on this post.  I'm going to the do pictures this week.

 

 

 

 

More Comment Responses

You might want to checkout your credit report at a site like freecreditreport.com or something. Why did they think you're account was automatically fraudulent? Is there something on your record? You might just want to look into it.

Rick, the reason my credit card member services reported my account as fradulent was because I used three times in one day. Something that is not typical of me and that sent up red flag. So yeah, everything got cleared up on their end. I just ended up with a guy who didn't give me a chance.

And the church's way of cussing? Why clean it up? Either say it the dirty way or not at all! Cleaning it up makes you like even more of a dork or 'goody two shoes'.

Yeah...Carlos I sort of agree. I'm just not sure if typepad would allow me to say the things that I wanted to say over my credit card. Why clean it up good question? Let me put it out to my readers. Am I better off being freer with my swearing on here or should I keep it somewhat clean? Actually, Carlos the reason I keep it cleaner on my blog is because something I get kids and parents visiting my site looking at the nature and science related posts. I can be a bit of goody two shoes at times. Do you think I am Carlos?? I might be more a dork than a good two shoes.

A salamander? It looks like a worm in a plate full of Tollhouse cookies

Rick those salamanders aren't all that big. They could almost pass for worms. The only issue is that these worms have legs. The Tollhouse cookies, you are talking about are actually bit and pieces of decaying wood.

My friend Gertie says hello and wants to make sure you cook your chicken thoroughly. She's concerned you're not eating well while your parents are away.

Gertie, Rick, the whole chicken thing was a fluke. Usually I am pretty good cook. I've been eating pretty good actually. Monday, I had poached fish, poached in orange juice, served with peas and carrots. Tuesday, I had a store bought pizza that had sausage, cheese, and green peppers and onions on it. Tonight, I had fish sticks, tater tots, and corn on the cob. No clue what I'm having tomorrow. I might do a foiled dinner. Yumm!

Well that takes care of that for right now. Have a great tonight.

My Mouth

Why not just say 'bullshit'? Why not just say Bullshit? I guess because, cussing is just not something that I do. Don't get me wrong, I can and do cuss. It's just not in my typical vocab. Though believe me I was cussing the night in question. The night that I had my issues with the credit card company. Now you can go back and read the post in question. I don't know normally when I cuss people actually laugh. Why do people laugh when I cuss? Don't get. Carlos, I could have said bullcrap, bullshit, or any number of colorful words. Still I think most people know what feces is and somewhow it sounds a little cleaner. Yeah, yeah, I know it's a typical LDS ( mormon ) thing to do. Some members of the church will come up with other words to say instead of swearing like dang, or darn. Any way, I guess it was easier to think of something to say then it was to fill the post up with cussing.

Cred Card CowFeces